I love inspiration. I always…, just a second, before I proceed I would like to highlight a relevant fact– though it won’t seem as such just now. Most of my friends consider me to be moody… I think. This comes from how they talk about me. They don’t use the word moody but their comments amount to the same thing. I have been asked on multiple occasions how it is that I can be “as cheerful as a body could be” on one day and then “gloomy and sad” on the next. I have also been told that my ever changing moods leave them (my friends) confused and they never know what to expect from me on any given day. They don’t know whether to expect “happy Colstar” or “sad Colstar”, “talkative Colstar” or “silent Colstar”. They say the cheerful Colstar is tolerable enough and they wouldn’t mind having him more regularly but that if I do not wish to drop the sad the Colstar, I should keep him in constant rotation because they are not too big on variety when it comes to a persons moods.
I think variety is a good thing. I wouldn’t want to experience extreme happiness every single day, I would grow numb to it. We all know that “joy wouldn’t feel so good if it wasn’t for pain” as 50 Cent once said in one of his songs (Many men). And also, there is a simple answer as to why my mood is always changing . That answer is inspiration. Now, I forgive the reader for wondering what in the devils name inspiration has to with moods…hmm let me explain. On days that I am cheerful it is because I feel inspired. When I feel inspired my mind suddenly starts to cook up ideas from left, right and centre and I have this huge urge to engage my senses; touch something (or if possible someone, a girl), see something, hear, taste, I want to work in all the senses, going mostly by instinct – thus not thinking too much. On such days I am “about whatever” as the rapper Drake would put it. But as soon as inspiration goes I feel as empty as an adult film star who has just been… wait that analogy won’t fly. Hmm… I feel like I have gone blind because the splendour of the world is not visible to me any more. That’s what the matter my friends! Anyone would “sad and gloomy” if they had a bright and beautiful world one day and the next it became dark. But that is why I love relationship inspiration. It’s never always in one place, sometimes you have it, and sometimes you don’t. Sometimes you feel inspired to write about promises, other times your mind is blank and you shamelessly write about inspiration and moods instead. I will end here, I have wondered aimlessly farther than any man has any right to.